I just drone through the day, minding my own business. I take showers, wash the dishes, fold some laundry, run a few errands; the same old daily circle. Then you cross my mind, and my world explodes with a brilliant light. I can feel the familiar warmth and I know, if anyone was around, they would see the unmistakable glow. It spreads through me and cuddles my heart like a warm blanket shielding me from the cold. On it spreads, and my shoulders lift, my toes curl, and my hands instinctively clench to hold onto the feeling. I close my eyes to give you my full concentration and I can feel my lips stretching wide across my face. The biggest smile I’ve ever smiled grows bigger with every step you take until I feel myself inhale deeply in response to your gentle embrace. The warm blanket tingles and tickles as I revel in its magnificent protection. I can feel you, smell you, see you, hear you and know you are here. As I bask in the intoxicating scene a rush of cold comes flooding in and you are gone. I can feel my comforter being ripped away. It leaves the way it comes as the river winds through me, suffocating the remaining embers. My shoulders give way, my toes become limp, and my hands instinctively clench to fight the feeling. I open my eyes to face reality and I can feel the swell rising to choke me before surging on to my eyes where it finally falls. A few tears escape before I close my eyes, clear my throat, and take a deep breath. I need to reach the bank before close of business... That's how I know that I love him.
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Dreaming of Romance
I grew up in a small town, attended a private school, and am now happily married with a little girl. I am pursuing a degree in Mechanical Engineering with a minor in Geography. I hope you enjoy my very first blog. I wrote this because I had an urge to write and would like some feedback. I thank you for any and all comments you may leave.
After the nightmares, I was both delighted and shocked by a most recent dream:
I recognized it as his R&R by the sense that he would be leaving very soon and the strange place filled with strange people that define a vacation. We had made love everyday of the trip until that day. Each time had been briefly squeezed in due to the crowded place and the presence of a few family members. He would be returning to a far away place in the morning and my eyes first saw him late that afternoon. I was very upset with him. I had hoped to spend the entire day with him and, at the very least, to make love once more before his departure. His absence had denied me my first hope and left little time for the second to be possible. We returned to our temporary lodge to find our daughter missing. After a brief search, she was found safely playing on the backyard playground. I realized that our time together had grown even shorter.
He knew I was aggravated with the situation, and I could feel my chest growing tighter with the sadness and anger dwelling there. Without a word passing between us of the days events, we had found ourselves alone in the late evening. He did not reciprocate my feelings nor did he seem surprised by my mood.
I was being particularly pouty and kept my distance, but he was not fazed by my coldness. Suddenly, he was standing very near so that our bodies were parallel as he towered over me. He gently supported my head with one of his hands, careful to keep space between us. The space was so narrow that I could feel the heat of his body. I did not respond to this sudden closeness, still dwelling on my hurt feelings, but he was not discouraged.
His breathing deepened, and his eyes held such intensity that my mind was too full to allow any more sulky thoughts to intrude. He looked so perfectly happy and so very wonderful that the happiness seemed to spill through his eyes into mine until I was consumed by the ecstasy and gratitude that he would save the best moments for me alone.
He was so close now that any slight movement would close the distance between us. My heart seemed to have stolen my lung's ability to work, and I wondered if I would lose consciousness before it beat through my chest. I watched in amazement at the control in his calm expression. He lowered his head, and I watched his eyes shift to my lips. I made an effort to move slowly, but I panicked in response to his retreat at my attempt to meet his lips. I helplessly struggled against his now firm grip on my wrists which were now above my head. I seemed to be pressed against a wall that I had not realized was so near before. Still in perfect control, he swept his sweet lips against mine and drew back quickly to take in my reaction. By his expression, he was obviously pleased with himself. My expression must have been saturated with desperation by now. I was aching from body to soul for him, on fire, and I could not bear being within reach of my desire, yet unable to have him. I strived to close the distance between us without much success. I could not remember a time when I had felt more passion or desire for him than in that one moment.
I awoke from my blissful sleep to our daughter asking for breakfast and wondered how such a dream could seem so real, especially when my husband was more than 30,000 miles away. Do dreams reveal our deepest desires, foretell the future, or perhaps only bring subconscious thoughts to the surface?
After the nightmares, I was both delighted and shocked by a most recent dream:
I recognized it as his R&R by the sense that he would be leaving very soon and the strange place filled with strange people that define a vacation. We had made love everyday of the trip until that day. Each time had been briefly squeezed in due to the crowded place and the presence of a few family members. He would be returning to a far away place in the morning and my eyes first saw him late that afternoon. I was very upset with him. I had hoped to spend the entire day with him and, at the very least, to make love once more before his departure. His absence had denied me my first hope and left little time for the second to be possible. We returned to our temporary lodge to find our daughter missing. After a brief search, she was found safely playing on the backyard playground. I realized that our time together had grown even shorter.
He knew I was aggravated with the situation, and I could feel my chest growing tighter with the sadness and anger dwelling there. Without a word passing between us of the days events, we had found ourselves alone in the late evening. He did not reciprocate my feelings nor did he seem surprised by my mood.
I was being particularly pouty and kept my distance, but he was not fazed by my coldness. Suddenly, he was standing very near so that our bodies were parallel as he towered over me. He gently supported my head with one of his hands, careful to keep space between us. The space was so narrow that I could feel the heat of his body. I did not respond to this sudden closeness, still dwelling on my hurt feelings, but he was not discouraged.
His breathing deepened, and his eyes held such intensity that my mind was too full to allow any more sulky thoughts to intrude. He looked so perfectly happy and so very wonderful that the happiness seemed to spill through his eyes into mine until I was consumed by the ecstasy and gratitude that he would save the best moments for me alone.
He was so close now that any slight movement would close the distance between us. My heart seemed to have stolen my lung's ability to work, and I wondered if I would lose consciousness before it beat through my chest. I watched in amazement at the control in his calm expression. He lowered his head, and I watched his eyes shift to my lips. I made an effort to move slowly, but I panicked in response to his retreat at my attempt to meet his lips. I helplessly struggled against his now firm grip on my wrists which were now above my head. I seemed to be pressed against a wall that I had not realized was so near before. Still in perfect control, he swept his sweet lips against mine and drew back quickly to take in my reaction. By his expression, he was obviously pleased with himself. My expression must have been saturated with desperation by now. I was aching from body to soul for him, on fire, and I could not bear being within reach of my desire, yet unable to have him. I strived to close the distance between us without much success. I could not remember a time when I had felt more passion or desire for him than in that one moment.
I awoke from my blissful sleep to our daughter asking for breakfast and wondered how such a dream could seem so real, especially when my husband was more than 30,000 miles away. Do dreams reveal our deepest desires, foretell the future, or perhaps only bring subconscious thoughts to the surface?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)